The foundation of our work is the universal equation of decision making: ValueCentered Psychology.
The core values and emotions that govern behavior can be likened to a tree. It doesn’t matter whether we’re talking about babies or relationships or financial transactions. It’s all the same.
You must begin by establishing some sense of security. Without this, everything else is marginal, difficult, or impossible. The roots must stay healthy if the tree is to stand.
With some trust, we can reach out to test what’s up. We feel free enough to explore. Freedom is expressed in our ability to act on the world or ourselves.
It can be described as having the freedom to act, with words such as control, independence, and power. It can also be described as freedom from unpleasant experiences, through concepts such as relief, peace of mind, or free from hassle.
As we feel secure and in control, we start to feel good about what is happening. We can feel smart, proud, or excited. In essence, we feel good about ourselves.
Esteem emerges from a sense of security and freedom. You cannot force it before the roots and trunk are sound.
If each value is sufficiently in place and continues to mature, a balance of the parts takes shape and grows until things are as good as they can be. All is right with the world.
We actively want that balance: that sense of harmony or completeness.
When all four values are met, we love our experience with whoever or whatever fulfills our core emotional needs! We become loyal and speak glowingly about our experience to our friends and family.
The tree is fully grown, is healthy, and blossoms.